Resolutions 2009: An Analytical Plan for a Creative Life.

As I shared recently, the new year has been a catalyst for me to think more intentionally about creativity and my struggle to get it back in to my life in meaningful ways. So today, and over the next few days, I’m going to share my plan to tackle that challenge in 2009.

Even though creativity is often stereotyped as being carefree or willy-nilly, my creative life in 2009 will be anything but haphazard. I need structure to get started and hold myself accountable, so my plan (a 2500+ word document that I’ll edit into small blog posts) consists of the following parts:

• Reasons
• Realities
• Requirements
• Rules
• Resources
• Rewards

Each part will be explained as I share it. Today I’m sharing my reasons for creating this plan and realities to acknowledge as I work on it.

Reasons

Why am I doing this? I want to be a creative person again. I mean creative in a holistic sense. Creativity as a way of thinking and as an approach to living, as well as in the more traditional expressions of creativity: reading, writing, art, music, and so on.

I have not invited creativity and imagination into my life with great intention since college, when coursework kept me focused and provided me with a venue for sharing my progress. I’ve become a more analytical person since college. I’ve always had a tendency to sacrifice anything that could appear to be frivolous when more practical matters or choices demand my attention. My analytical decision-making can be pretty exacting – and it has smothered my creative attempts over the past few years.

Here is the hard truth about my creative life in 2008: I wrote next to nothing, if you don’t count a collection of journal entries. Maybe two poems? I did not read any novels. I read blogs almost exclusively, save for a few books of poetry. I did not listen to music nearly as much as I used to. I doodled a little, tried to teach myself embroidery, but never followed through on much in the way of art. I attended a few performances and events, probably my most active area of creative participation. But that was always as a spectator.

In 2008, the best thing I created was a new excuse for not attempting to be creative. I disallowed myself from participating in creative opportunities because I felt I had not earned it. This sounds really melodramatic, but here’s an example: Billy Collins judged a local poetry contest. Billy Collins is one of my favorite poets. Just getting my work in front of him would be a special thrill, regardless of whether I placed in the contest.

I didn’t allow myself to enter the contest. Maybe it’s a good old Catholic sensibility about guilt and punishment, but I felt that if I wasn’t going to take my writing seriously enough to practice it regularly, I didn’t deserve to start trying just because Billy Collins was judging a contest and I was all starry-eyed about that.

I regret being so stubborn. Stubborn about not writing, stubborn about taking away my own opportunities. Pretty stupid.

So 2009 has to be different. I need to be creative, and I need structure to avoid making excuses or unnecessarily punishing myself. Ironically, creating a plan to do this is a very analytical approach, but perhaps it’s a good exercise in beginning to marry the two parts.

Realities

Intentionally building a creative life is affected by a set of realities. I believe the more I acknowledge these realities at the outset, the less likely I am to make assumptions about my process or take my progress for granted.

• I have stability, support, and flexibility. I know these are luxuries that not everyone has, and I can’t take that for granted. If I do, it will be that much easier to take my creative life for granted.
• This is a personal commitment. No one or nothing else can be held accountable for any stumbles along the way, and in the same way, the successes will be uniquely mine.
• There are only so many hours in a day. I need to stop scheduling my time unrealistically and become more comfortable with the idea that not all time has to be actionable, and not all days need to produce something that makes a big contribution.
• I am human. (Ta da!) The truth is, I have not written or read consistently in a long time. I will make mistakes. I may even produce some crappy stuff. If it bothers me, I’ll make 2010 a year of polishing up and perfecting my craft (although “craft” seems like a highly evolved state from where I am right now, so maybe 2011? 2012?).

I expect these realities to change as I change, and it’s safe to assume I’m operating with more assumptions than I know right now. That’s part of the learning I hope to do… to get familiar with the underlying factors that affect my creativity and figure out how to manage them.

I’d love anyone’s thoughts on any of this, or links to your plans for the new year! My next post will share my requirements and rules for becoming creative in 2009. That means I have one more night to change them before I commit to anything publicly. :)